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I am a Hermit, Mystic & Mama.
I am a Hermit, Mystic & Mama.
How crisis can be a blessing rather than a curse if we look at what lesson it has to teach us.
Crisis can either break us down or raise us in our resilience.
Crisis can also help us to grow in resilience in managing and handling difficult situation.
I often thought that I do not have strong resilience. 'Tested' again and again through many crisis in my life, my resilience grows more and more. I encountered personal and professional 'crisis'. Yet in each time, I walked out of the crisis, stronger, wiser, more compassionate than ever. The day I say Yes to Love, I know pain is inevitable and is part and parcel of being fully human. If I love, I feel pain too. This kind of pain is actually compassion. Being able to put oneself in another's person shoes yet at the same time holding both the space for others and self. Lovingly we hold the space, lovingly we also take care of self. However I find ways to be with my pain. These days when I met with 'crisis', I find myself bounce back much quicker as compared to the past. I acknowledge in the past I suffered from compassion fatigue and now after contemplation in silence, authentic movement and sabbatical period, I learn the art of having healthy loving boundary for self.
The embodiment of self-care as my theme has been for many years - learning to set boundary, knowing my limits, loving myself unconditionally and letting God heal me, the crisis I faced and facing, taught me to listen and attune actively and intuitively to myself.
Very interestingly, I always go through the pain first. My spirit and soul prepares me ahead. I listen and make space to hold myself or with a loving compassionate soul. I often find myself in each situation calls for me to hold others, I find I have the strength and resilience to hold them. Because I learn how to hold myself with love and not judging. I thank in every opportunity to serve others, I embody and grow in resilience.
Crisis not only affects self but family too. It can break the family up or bring the family even more closer. I'm so grateful both sides of my family through the crisis draws us even closer. What is the beauty of it is that we very spontaneously take turns to take care of the situation. It just flows on its own. The most important lesson I learn is first to take care of self before helping others. It is the same concept with the emergency landing when we are flying - "Put on the mask first on self before we attend to anyone." Nita also shared, "What we don't have, we cannot give."
I learn a very valuable lesson. Every crisis has a gift to teach us to grow, mature and develop self and relationship with our loved ones if we see it. I also see that because we are strong enough, in my case, faith, to withstand what is to happen. I never see it that way before until Nita shed a deep insight about my father-in-law. We always want happiness. All of us do. However, I see how crisis brings happiness in the midst of suffering like treasuring the little moments of time together. Somehow that memory holds much deeper in our hearts. How the quote rings so true, 'Count our blessings in our life.' Crisis are life lessons if we can see it and what lessons it has to teach us.
Am I saying to let crisis hit us? Well, I put it in this way. Until we learn the lessons in life it means to teach us. I call it 'crisis' and it refers to any kind of challenges, obstacles... that comes our way, it is to teach us something we need to overcome. Or lessons we learn first in our lives before we can even empower others. I'm not saying we intentionally inviting it however I come to discover when there is a lesson we yet to learn, the situation keeps repeating itself somehow until we see it. Did you ever observe that in your life?
One Valuable Lesson I learn:
When we grow in less fear and more love, we find joy, peace, harmony, contentment in us even when a crisis hits us, we have the strength and resilience to manage it. We would not get caught by surprise. In fact, we have the innate strength to be loving and compassionate.
Though I know crisis is hard to bear, no one would like to go through it, so do I. Sometimes I even ask why do I have to go through so many crisis in life. One other lesson is because I had not set clear boundary for myself, to love myself unconditionally. Until the day I did, the crisis is no more a crisis or do I feel that it is a crisis but an opportunity for me to practise boundary setting or a reminder to love myself unconditionally, another reminder lesson if I forget again. And the kind of crisis I face is no longer the drama crisis I used to face as I am very clear I do not entertain it but crisis like someone who faces death or illnesses, I'm able to hold them in a more compassionate loving space.
Gratitude practise is also one of the ways I look at the crisis with gratefulness especially when I learn a valuable lesson from it. I do sometimes can feel very angry that I had nothing to say or want to give gratitude. However when we enter into the gratitude prayer with each other, in this case, Jereon, my husband, my heart melts and healing comes when it surfaces. Walking the path of healing and in spirituality has shifted me and led me home, to the seed sowed in me before I was born. After lovingly sprinkle daily nourishment of kindness, gentleness, compassion, love in self over the years, I love life and truly find Heaven on Earth.
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* Come & join me in the 11 March workshop - Embodied Active Listening - Setting Clear Boundary. Check the registration link in the FaceBook Page.
Shalom! Peace-FuLL! Bless-FuLL ! Love-FuLL To you!