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Artist  Sacred Dancer  Author
​    Spiritual Mother Gardener
Hermit, Mystic, Mama of Sanctuary Forest Wild Garden
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1/4/2018 2 Comments

Awakening - A Wake Up Call

Picture
A dream Jeroen is living now - black & white classic photography.
In my personal life, I had many wake up calls - awakening to my whole being, soul and spirit.  Many people around me personal, loved ones, closed friends, friends had either committed suicide, sudden or unexpected death, or to illnesses.  Each time, I was led to rethink and ponder deep about my life - probably that was partly also why I live life to the fullest and live life with meaning and purpose, do what I love and find joy in.  Deep inside me for a long time, I long to live a quiet life in the nature in the countryside.  I just know deep within me.  In the last 2 years or more, the forest and nature is also coming me home. As I moved in Authentic Movement, as I visited Nature, I feel the yearning of the forest, to live in the forest, to be in the forest more and more. 

The death of my mother-in-law and other news again woke my soul - another awakening - to review my life.  Jeroen's too.  His colleagues have also passed on without even reaching pension age and that also led him to rethink about life.  In 2017, during my Sabbatical period, it was also his process parallel with mine - as we walked side by side, hand in hand, with tears, laughter, pain, joy, healing and challenging each other to look at our life honestly and truthfully, as an individual and as a couple.  We bare our souls. We bare our hearts with each other even though it was hard at times and painful.  The process and journey always draws us closer, stronger and wiser each time.

​So...


​What do I want in life?
What do we want in life?

Are we going to wait till retirement to fulfil our dreams?
​Maybe we may not even live to that age?

Seriously, we never know what life brings and what life has in store for us.

​We've processed the theme of death not once but a lot of times when it surfaced over the years as married couple.
​Jeroen was very uncomfortable to talk about it at first however now he has come to be at peace with the theme. Only then, he lets go and trusts life, so do I.  We both know either one of us is to go first, we know we can move on in life.  For us, we trust fully in God, trust fully in life, trust fully in ourselves and in one another. As Hildegard von Bingen wisely wrote (see photo):

Picture
Both of us matured individually as a person as well as our journey as a couple.  Learning to trust fully.  It was not an easy journey and the theme 'Trust" is so profoundly deep in many aspects of life whether in self, in another, in life, in God (for us), in the unknown, in the future, especially in the here and now.  Trust is one huge theme for me other with other themes like boundary, death, holding space... over the past years.  The theme grows deeper and deeper as I let myself, let God reveal to me, the significance meaning of each theme and what each is for my life.  

​Sabbatical, retreats, contemplation brought about in me the meaning of meaningful early retirement.  To many, you probably think sabbatical, retreats and contemplation are such big words and only for the religious or people in spirituality.  In reality, we have to look at our retirement, don't we? 

I'm being led by my soul and spirit to question my life in these modalities at the early stages of my life and to rethink about life and in the essence, it is about retirement.  Both of us come to recognise we are not going to wait till retirement to live our dreams or fulfil our dreams. It is NOW. Not 10 or 20 years down the road. 

Our dreams are NOT about pursuing success, achievements, status... which the world paints it as such.  Our dreams is to live and love life, find pure pleasure in what we love, whether it is with self or with others.  More love, more joy, more laughter, more heart to heart communication, more walks in the nature, pure simple pleasure of life, slowing down, relaxing in each other's presence, and more... to live life with more ease and move with more flow.

​For Jeroen, is to pusure his passion in old classic photography and I, in my art, gardening and writing.  Cooking is both our passion.  To name a few.  There is one big dream we both have and are moving to realise it, our deepest desire.  It will be revealed in its own good time as we trust God in it.  Trust.  Trust will show us the way.  Know that if it is for the greater good for not just self but also for the greater good of others, God will bless it.  The dream we desire deeply is not just going to bless us but also to bless others. 

​Each one of us is unique and different. Each one of us has our own dreams we want to live because we love it.  Take time to review, to look into and within.  Wait not till when it hits us so hard that we find ourselves awakened and being shaken up so rudely - in order to get us to pay attention to the constant soft nudging in our heart and soul - our deepest heart desire.  How long are you going to wait? 

​* Nita has walked hers and now Jeroen and I have walked ours. Nita and I will offer you taster programmes in the 2018 soon, to taste and experience what meaningful early retirement means for you and we empower and prepare you to have a meaningful retirement in your life. ​
2 Comments
Michiel
1/4/2018 07:56:05 pm

I had my wake up almost 5 years ago. It's personal and I have always kept it for myself. But I just stumbled upon a young person who died 2 years prior on the other side of the world. It was the realisation what that person had meant to others and had done in so little time. I woke up. I was older than this person and hadn't even done or experienced half the things in my life. I got this cold feeling that I was wasting my life. Death can be a huge motivator. I started to do and see so much more, living more consious then ever. And that is still something I am working on. It keeps growing, no matter how much I sometines struggle in life, I can always come back and find inspiration.

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Elizabeth
1/5/2018 07:20:25 am

Thank you again for your open heartfelt sharing. You woke up and you did something about it. Not many do or have the courage. I'm amazed! At your age! WoW! You learn in the process as you journey and grow and see that doing and being are very different. What is by being in the doing. Yes, it is normal to struggle in life as we are constantly surrounded by the non-stop overwhelming information. I've faith that you grow in wisdom! Looking forward to walking with you in the silent retreat in June at the Abbey! <3

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    Author

    Shalom! Peace-FuLL! Bless-FuLL ! Love-FuLL To you!

    I am Elizabeth, and also known as Angel Rose.  My Chinese name is
    黃 秀 珠.

    Ever since I come home to my true self,  I dare to step out and dance in the heart and garden of love.
    ​
    My desire to post here is to have courage to show up as who I am and in return to inspire each beautiful soul on earth to live life as who he/she is.  I am a seeker so I encourage you to be and continue to be a seeker.  Life is inevitable with ups and downs, challenges along our human journey.  However when we make time to insure the growth of our inner garden - our heart with  self-care, nourishment, growth, healing, play, creativity, silence and loving ourselves unconditionally, we can live life to the fullest with peace, bliss, contentment and gratitude, and  we can go forth to serve others in true joy and love.  I share here my journey with you as well as the ordinary moments I witness, experience and encounter in my daily life.  Let us journey together.  Let our journey begins.  let each of our unique soul's story unfolds like a rose opens her petals, revealing her heart. 
    <3

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